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I’ve always been a fan of Adrian Plass‘s writing, he always feels very down to earth with his humour. I even met him once and he said he wanted to swap lives with me (because I was in my early 20s at the time)! This book I didn’t love as much as some, it’s still funny, it’s still got stuff to make you think, but it felt a bit confused of its own identity. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

The book is done in the format of a dictionary (or a glossary? what’s the difference?!) of Christian terminology, but when you go to read it, most of it is not serious. There are play on words, a good number of anagrams, silly observations about Christian culture, and then every now and then, a multi page anecdote which is quite tenuously linked to whatever the word was. They’re fun to read, but this is where I find the book a bit confusing about what it’s trying to be.

I did enjoy it, but over the bank holiday weekend I kept finding myself reading it, but more so that I could finish it and start something else. It was hit and miss for sure, some of the hits are below, the misses are what made me want to finish.

I really did enjoy some of his re-written song lyrics, a couple of examples below (bearing in mind this was published 20 years ago and the songs needed to be easily familiar to the reader, they’re all 20th century (or older?!))

• “The name of the Lord is
  A strong tower
  The righteous run into it
  And bang their heads”
  
• “And can it be, that no one was concerned
  When I staggered in with an awkward lurch
  If they had asked me, they might have learned
  I came of my bike on the way to church
  My chain came off
  I swerved into a tree
  I smashed my shin
  And grazed my knee
  My chain, my chain came off….”
  
• “Father God I wonder
  why they bother with a speaker
  when they have a worship leader
  who’s as wonderful as me.
  Now they won’t be needing
  all that Holy Spirit leading
  they have asked for twenty minutes
  but my kind of talent knows no limits.
  I will sing for ever
  I will sing for ever
  I will sing for ever, for evermore.”

And then some of the other bits that caught my attention

• “Alpha: outreach system that has brought thousands to faith, but has left in its wake a small, deeply confused group of people who have mistakenly asked Nicky Gumbel into their lives.”
• “Ashurbanipal: a name slipped into the fourth chapter of Ezra by God for the purpose of preserving humility in those who think they are such good sight readers that they don’t need to prepare the Sunday lesson.”
• “Good Samaritan: fictional biblical character in a parable told by Jesus. Claimed as Tory by the Conservatives because his investments had provided sufficient resources for him to be able to help if he so wished, as a socialist by the Labour Party because he was actually willing to share his money, and by the Liberal Democrats because the crowd that was listening to the parable automatically assumed that he would be useless.”
• “Grace: prayer said before meals by most Christians when fellow believers are visiting and by rather fewer when they are not.”
• “Human beings: the main reason for God sending his Son and, coincidentally and ridiculously, the main obstacle to the fulfilment of his plan.”
• “Nation word that, for some reason, is almost invariably used in formal Christian situations instead of the word “country,” presumably because “nation” has a more monumental and significant ring to it.”